“There is nothing permanent in life but change.” Greek Proverb
When I was in my mid 20’s, I had a girlfriend named Doreen. She and I had everything in commune. She was my best friend. One day she came to me and told me that she wanted to go back to school. She had applied at several universities and the one that had accepted her was in Pennsylvania. A few weeks later she moved, leaving me behind. I was so hurt. I knew that it was the best for Doreen, but it made me angry that she had to leave. I couldn’t bring myself to even talk to her. When she settled in school she wrote me, but I couldn’t write her back because I couldn’t deal with the anger I was feeling for her departure and didn’t know how to tell her how I felt. Ten years later she came back and looked me up. She had married and had a child by then. I was happy to see her but I still felt an emptiness in my heart for the way things were. After all these years I still miss her. Now I am truly sorry that I did not keep up with her. Even though we were miles apart, we could have enjoyed each others life though correspondence. She wanted to be my friend but I had closed myself off, built a wall around myself.
Looking back over my life I have seen a lot of people come and go who were close to me. The average American family moves every five years. We are a transit society. We can’t expect to grow up in the same place and have the same friends for our lifetime. That doesn’t mean that we can’t keep those friends that we make. For every friend that moves away there is another friend waiting to move in.
We are living on a spire that is hurtling though space at 67000 miles an hour? In addition, the earth is spinning on its axes at a rate of about 1000 miles and hour. The days turn nights, and the nights turn to days. The tides ebb and flow. The wind is constantly circulating, from where it comes or where it goes no one knows. The length of the day changes. The season changes. We’ve got to expect some change in our life too. We can not expect our life to remain the same.
My mom and I used to play a game every morning. We would have our coffee on the porch and look for the perfect day of each month. Sure enough, there was at least one day a month that was just perfect. It was a day better than all the rest. For example, the perfect day in May might be a warm sunny morning with the dew clinging to the spider web in the corner of the porch and the smell of roses drifting in the air, or the perfect day in February would be a sunny day that followed a snow storm, the air would be dry and cold, the snow would be piled high on the evergreen trees like whip cream, and the only thing that you could see moving in a white wonderland was a red cardinal. We looked forward to discovering each of those perfect days and appreciated every one of them although they were all different. I can still remember and enjoy the experience of them today. I finally realize that friendships are like those special days too. Throughout my lifetime, I have had the opportunity to experience many wonderful friendships and I know that I will have the opportunity to experience many more if I don’t close myself off. I can cherish the ones I have had and look forward to the ones that will come in the future. I must accept that a friend like a day will only be with me for a certain time before they must leave, but I can keep them in my heart forever.